Doner.

I dont know what else to tell you.  I hate to break it to you, but I just don't feel the same way about you as I will any other? 

I mean, with all do respect, you're just another stranger to me.  As much as I try to find it in me, it's just not the same.  Dispite the histories and misunderstandings and the willings; it's just not the same.  I am willing to give what I can, but with all the effort of myself?  I'm not so sure... I understand the differences that the two of you once had in the past; but whatever it was, it's still the same.  -Nothing has changed.  As much as I want to say the things I know I should be saying, I'm sorry because those words are just empty words.  -And seeing you, the way that you were,.. I'm sorry that I'm not truly -truly sorry for you.  Call me bitter and what kind of person am I to have say the things I am saying, -I'm sorry, you created me this way.  It's not guilt that I'm trying to make you feel..  I just want you to realize, that you're a nobody in my life.  But rather someone who I've meet once in my life, and is continuiously peeking into my life from afar.  I'm not sorry for you, I'm just sorry that you missed out on a lot of good stuff; a whole series of my life and seasons.

If you're asking me to forgive you?  Yes I sure can..  -And honestly, I wouldn't know what for?  But forgiveness is not going to change the way I feel about you.  -You're still going to be another stranger that has to be placed in my life...

P.S.
Feel better.

Summer 2011

As many of you have already know, of figured out actually, -Im constantly thinking about my future.  -Go giver..

I mean, it's not a bad thing, but as of now, it is clear that -that is what is on my mind most of the time.  Nevermind, I'll just get to the chase =)

* The sun shines, smile =) It's as simple as that.  My days have been a lot better and brighter.  I can not express how bless I have been.  The trials in my life, whether you call it bad or good -I am and have been blessed; continuing to be bless..  I am love. 

Relationship; Not a day goes by that I do not think about you and how wonderful you have been in my life.  It's hard to see hardships and downfalls around me, but I am happy to that we are not any near close.  I hate admit that I am in love, or at least, this is what I believe it to be..  Because if it isn't, I can only imagine Love being even greater =)  Nonetheless, I am content, happy, sad, angry, all that I can imagine..  But overall, I have content.  My heart has made up its mind... =)

Social; As life reaches its hardships, I pray, -that it will not bring you a heavy heart.  Family, friends, -people..  Admit, you must be thankful they are there.  -Admit again, that even those you believe to 'hate,' it's such a strong word, made you the person you are today -stronger, I hope.  Regardless, be thankful.  But I am thankful I have you in mine..  My heart's with you that you are better today than you were yesterday my friends =)

July 2011

No, I am not wasting my times in sighs and late night pondering over what could have been, or what went wrong, or what have I done or anything else..

I am not -close to even being that loser, that sucker sucking the best of myself out for no good reason.
But I am, -coming your way...

There has never been a piece of mind, when I can recall being greater than you are.  It is each and every day, that I think of this world nothing more and nothing less than it already is.  I can not face the fact that I am a part of it.  It is just not in my "soul nature," to believe that this is what 'this Body of mine' belongs too.  Then again, I suppose, its just a body in which I am trapped in for now.

Nonetheless, I am growing.  -There are many things in my life, that I still question..  But that is just the kid in me.  I am miserable, I am absolutely nothing without You.  Each and everyday I seek Your face.  Some things are never the same..  I'm puzzled in this mind set of mine.  It is everytime, that I feel my thoughts throwing and shooting out with no sense of explanation or logical sense.

But there is one thing I know for sure,... Im coming Your way...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3MalcI8_nqc&feature=related